Taking things for granted

I suppose at this time of year I'm bound to become reflective. I think back on the year gone by, look forward to the year ahead and get planning. There are some things I assume are taken care of or are guaranteed - unfortunately, that isn't always the case.

For the last few weeks things haven't been quite right with me.  Early in December I developed a cough. Initially I thought it was no big deal, everyone is ill at this time of year. I thought I would cough and sneeze for a couple of days, sleep a lot and then be right as rain. Uni would be rubbish but then I'd bounce back and get back to hardcore revision for finals. However, a week later after downing a bottle of cough mixture, drinking my body weight in lemon and ginger tea and sleeping for 14 hours a night every night I wasn't any better.

A Londoner in the North - Day 1

So after a long break from writing I've travelled to 'the North' to do a 2 week stint in GP land and have found some fodder for this here blog. Now I'm a city kid, lived in London all my life and coming this far away from civilisation home is a somewhat daunting process. I've long had a wish to live outside of London in a land where there are green things growing from the ground outside but after today I'm not sure how I'd fare...

Reading for pleasure

I've realised recently that I really want to read a book.

Thanks to the drudgery that is medical school I spend too many hours reading boring PowerPoint slides and textbooks. It is now at the point where I almost despise the idea of doing any more reading than I absolutely have to. Almost.

Then I walked through a bookshop yesterday. An old familiar joy welled up inside me, a smile played about my lips as I gingerly thumbed a couple of books that looked interesting. I long for a story. For people, not nondescript text or information that I just have to memorise.

Ever since getting a shiny new kindle for my birthday last year I have done precious little more reading than I hoped I would. Unfortunately this is the wrong time of year to get into an all consuming reading habit, enjoyable as it would be :(

I think I'll have to settle for small amounts of reading for pleasure scattered in between hours of revision in the library. It might help to keep my spirits up over the next three months.

Broken Promises

A long long time ago I promised you regular posting. I promised you a whole series on my thoughts about passion. I promised to start writing seriously. I promised I would make my life more interesting, more meaningful. I promised I would do things on purpose.

I haven't done any of these things.

I have no excuses. I accept full responsibility for my rubbishness.

But I'm not going to complain (much). I'm getting up, dusting myself off, and moving on.

A Log and a Speck

So umm, I haven't posted anything on my blog for 7 1/2 months now.

To be honest what's brought me back to here is the fact that I've recently been nagging a friend of mine to post on his blog more often. You see, he started a blog at the beginning of this year saying that he would post every week until the end of 2011 and as soon as it lapsed for a few weeks I let him know it. If only he knew....

Anyway, I wouldn't say this guy isn't a particularly close friend of mine. However, through reading his blog, which sometimes becomes quite personal, I (feel like I) have gained an insight into some parts of his life that I doubt I would have known about from our sporadic conversations. I feel like a fly on the wall silently observing him - well, the parts he chooses to share online anyway. I feel privileged to know these things - like he has confided in me specially, which is rather ironic considering that a weblog is anything but confidential. I am also a little in awe and humbled by his display of openness, honesty and vulnerability. Bizarrely , I feel like I can't really speak to him about the personal matters that he puts on his blog. It feels like I'm cheating at friendship, or that I'm reading his mind.

My eagerness to correct his 'log' has prompted me to re-examine my 'speck' of cyberspace. Looking back on this, it looks like a failure - a confused, self-indulgent and unfinished diary.
But every grey cloud has a silver lining. I firmly believe that life is a journey and not a destination. There is something to be learned from everything that happens.
I like writing, so I think I will carry on.